Jumbled thoughts from a jumbled mom-brain. Sounds about right.

I need to wake up earlier in the mornings, to get my thoughts into writing more often.  I hate how I wake up, get in the shower and have all of these thoughts and ideas during the day (does that happen to you in the shower?  It’s like Owen Wilson says in “Midnight in Paris” – you get all those “positive ions flowing” in the shower.  For me, anyway), and then by the time I put Claire down for her one nap and sit down to write, my mind goes blank.  She exhausts my brain so much some days that I literally go sit in my bed, pull a blanket over me and I stare at the ceiling for a good twenty minutes before telling myself to get up and exercise.  Or clean.  Or eat.  You know how it goes.

I love my morning time to myself, and almost on a daily occurrence I tell myself that I should wake up earlier tomorrow, so I can sit and drink some coffee in bed, take a longer shower, and do more blog posts.  Usually I get up in just enough time to get a shower and put half my face on and sip some coffee for maybe 10 minutes before I hear the inevitable fussing on the monitor.  Time for the day to start!

idea bulb

Anyway.  That being said, I had a bunch of inspired ideas this morning and can maybe recall two of them?  So I thought I’d bullet point them today, to get them out of my brain.  I’m going to start carrying a notebook around with me wherever I go.  You know, for science.

  • I’m starting to meet some other SAHMs through Claire’s activities at the library and Kindermusik.  It’s really been nice.  This morning Claire was driving me nuts with asking for things, and saying things over and over (and over and over) again until I acknowledge what she says (if I don’t she starts to scream at me.  It’s just a phase, right?) that I was starting to get a little short with her, which always makes me feel like mom of the year.  So I finally stuff her into the car seat and get to music class, and she is her usual painfully shy self among all the other littles.  But I started talking to the other moms a lot more than normal today, and it felt so good to have some adult conversation!  So it made me think, maybe (probably) her little baby activities are as much for me as they area for her.  I found out about a few more weekly activities through these moms, and at least one of them includes me dropping her off for three hours while she plays and mommy gets some sanity time.  I’m scared Claire will freak out judging by how she acts at music class, but with time I think it would be good for her.
  • My dad is coming to visit us this weekend – in fact, my husband will be picking him up at the airport in about 2 hours, so I better finish cleaning.  He and Sean are going to build Claire a playset this weekend, and I just know she will love it.  I am not loving spending all the money on it (have you ever shopped around for one?  Insanity!), but we got some donations from the grandparents so hopefully that softens the blow a bit.  Which brings me to:
  • We have had a lot of expensive things happen to us ever since – and just before- the big move.  Crazy expensive car fixes, the cost of moving, buying a new oven in our new home because the one we got with the house decided to die, various home repairs, and a couple of repairs at our home that we own and lease out in Washington.  We have always been good savers so it hasn’t ruined us or anything but it is so hard to watch our money go to stuff like that.  I’m hoping our bad luck has almost run its course, but this year has taught me that Murphy’s Law is in full effect so I better be careful not to talk in absolutes.
  • For that reason, I am starting to look a lot more closely at our monthly expenditures.  I feel like we have a comfortable monthly budget, my husband makes good money, yet we always feel like money is tight.  So I started looking at what we spend money on every month, and I realized after just a quick analysis yesterday that I am spending a TON of money on groceries.  Groceries!  The last thing I thought money was being wasted on.  It’s true that I am always experimenting in the kitchen, and that our daughter is an eating machine, and that we rarely eat out anymore because we have been trying to reign in our spending, but even given all of that we are spending too much.  Maybe I should become one of those crazy couponers.  Thoughts?

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  • How I wish I had time to post about the home/design projects I’ve been doing around the house.  Nothing major, but little touches can make such a big difference.  I have several (dozens) of photos in my phone and on my fancy camera that I am dying to post on here, but I never feel like I have the time to do it justice.  I need to have Sean keep Claire occupied for a few hours on the weekend so I can sit down and do it!
  • Lastly, we have started talking about trying for another baby.  We only want one more, and I’m starting to feel like we should start trying and then I don’t have to think about when to start trying anymore!  Sounds weird but I don’t want to wait forever- for the most part I feel like we should just have a second baby (God willing) and then our family is complete and we can move on from that phase of life.  I kind of feel like I’m in this in between limbo period of raising a family, and I literally think about it every day.  These days of just me and Claire have been and are so special, and I do cherish every single one of them.  But I feel like a year or so from now would be a good time to welcome another blessing (again: God willing), and that gives me another year or so alone with Claire.  That, and I’m surrounded by military wives who seem to be baby factories and I kinda think it’s rubbing off on me.  Help.  When do you know when the time is right??  I really don’t want to rush on this.

I better get back to cleaning before my dad arrives.  Pray for me – we haven’t always had the best relationship, but in the last year or two he has really tried to be a part of my life and so I have tried hard too.  It might be a little awkward at first.  I promise to report back.

À bientôt.

 

 

 

 

 

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